A lawyer has revealed how using fewer words can make you a better communicator – and also make you come across as more credible.
Jefferson Fisher, from Texas, who is also a communication expert, podcaster, and author, shared the information while appearing on Steven Bartlett‘s Diary of a CEO show.
During the conversation, Jefferson – who boasts six million followers on Instagram and often posts about why the language you choose to use can have a big impact on how you present yourself – covered a number of topics around how people can become better communicators.
But one of his main messages was about how using people can say more by saying less. He explained that in his opinion, ‘every little word matters’.
Illustrating how frustrating it can be when people say too much rather than being concise, Jefferson said: ‘You’ve had those texts where somebody gives you a whole paragraph. I don’t know how to respond to [that].
‘What I teach is that the longer your answer, the more questions you’re going to get, the longer that conversation is going to go, the longer the argument is going to go.
‘So you have to find ways to say more with less.’
When Steven asked whether that means whether the amount he speaks has consequence, Jefferson said it does.
Lawyer Jefferson Fisher, from Texas (pictured) boasts six million followers on Instagram and often posts about why the language you choose to use can have a big impact on how you present yourself
He then added that using more words can seem deceptive, explaining: ‘It’s this idea of the more words it takes to tell the truth, the more it sounds like a lie, like the more you have to say to explain something.
‘To me, the more I start to assume you don’t know what you’re talking about.’
He continued: ‘And we have [what is called] word vomit, where you just you talk a whole lot. People get lost in your sentences. Also, when you choose to speak makes a very big difference.
‘Have you ever been one of those meetings? And there’s always this one person that has to throw in their two cents. They always have to throw out their idea or be the devil’s advocate. They have something to say [something about] every single issue that gets brought up most of the time.
‘Those are the people that are honestly the least connected to what’s actually happening, or at least part of the conversation, because they want you to know how smart they are.’
He also shared his ‘dead giveaway’ that someone is being deceitful, saying that when a person is being deceitful, they will often use absolutes and extreme wording in an attempt to deflect the listener from sniffing out their lies.
His one red flag to watch out for is the word ‘never’, as it is often a favourite among fibbers, he said.
Jefferson told Steven: ‘Never is an extreme. Extremes are a dead giveaway that they’re usually not telling the truth.’
According to Jefferson, using too many words can lead to arguments, and can make ‘people get lost in your sentences’ (stock image)
The attorney gave an example, telling Steven to ask him: ‘Were you texting while you were driving that day?’
Jefferson then responded: ‘No, I never text. Never text when I drive.’
He added: ‘Everybody texts when they drive at some point. That’s why the word stands out.’
The lawyer said that liars will often reply quickly to your questions without thinking about what has been asked of them.
This is because they are not thinking back to a memory or trying to recall anything – instead they are just rehearsing what they have already planned in their head.
Jefferson says that this tactic can be reversed and used to catch them out, simply by slowly repeating the question.
He used the example: ‘You never text while driving?’
This can cause the deceiver to crumble and go back on their original answer.
Jefferson says went on the Diary of a CEO podcast with Steven Bartlett (pictured) and discussed his top communication tips
He added: ‘What they’ll do most often is say, “Well, I mean, sometimes I do.” Now they know “never” is a risk word.’
However, Jefferson advised the key thing is not to pounce on them once they start back peddling as this can be counterproductive.
Instead, the legal practitioner said that it is important to ‘give them an out’. For example, saying: ‘If you were texting, it’s okay’.
Jefferson said that this strategy can depressurise the situation and instead allow them to be honest.
However, there is a third way to crack a fabricator – staying completely silent.
‘Silence is the ultimate nemesis of liars,’ he expressed. They create dialogues in their minds for you.’
The painful quietness can often make them feel uncomfortable and leave them itching to fill in the gaps by explaining themselves without even being asked.
