Hidden signs in your home that scream you’re ‘common’: Socialite Nicky Haslam reveals artwork that says your tastes are lower-class – and takes a pop at Kate Moss

Socialite and arbiter of all things posh Nicky Haslam has released his annual controversial list of all things ‘common’ – and it will certainly ruffle some feathers.

The furniture designer, 85, began releasing his tea towels, titled ‘The Latest Things Nicky Haslam Finds Common’, in 2018 usually just in time for Christmas, but he has put one on the market early this year in collaboration with Saatchi Yates, a London-based art gallery.

He has titled his £50 tea towel ‘Art Things Nicky Haslam Finds Common’ and the list contains 36 places and people who are lower class and concepts, words and phrases that he believes are used by ‘commoners’.

This year, Haslam, who is based in the Cotswolds, has aimed his infamous tea towel at art snobs and says that silent auctions, selling art and ‘artsplaining’ are low-brow. 

He also took aim at supermodel Kate Moss, who is on the list of averageness, despite modelling some of the world’s most famous art in the form of fashion, strutting down the catwalk clad in Gucci, Versace, Calvin Klein and Vivienne Westwood. She even designed her own sell-out collections with Topshop and Zara. 

The 51-year-old spent her younger years in Croydon with her parents, barmaid Linda and Peter, then an airline employee, and admitted that it ‘wasn’t easy’ growing up in south east London.

And despite being one of the original ‘It’ girls of the 90s, she has certainly been reminded of her status in the industry professionals.

In 2007, US store Barney’s then-creative director Simon Doonan called Moss  ‘a working-class s**g from a crap town, like me,’ according to Vogue.

Socialite and arbiter of all things posh Nicky Haslam has released his annual controversial list of all things 'common'

Socialite and arbiter of all things posh Nicky Haslam has released his annual controversial list of all things ‘common’

Also on Haslam’s list was the colour white and The Mona Lisa, arguably Leonardo da Vinci’s most famous painting which now sits proudly in the Louvre Museum in Paris. 

Millions of tourists descend on the French capital to catch a glimpse of the slightly smiling brunette woman, an international symbol of art. But for Haslam, the painting is basic and ringarde

Also on the list of ‘common things’ is Banksy, a pseudonymous England-based street artist and political activist. 

The anonymous artist has been painting on public streets and signs since the early noughties and is responsible for some of the most famous pieces of art in the world. 

Balloon Girl is one of his most recognisable displays and it is of a monochrome young girl appearing to let go of red heart shaped balloon carried away by the wind.

However, during a live auction in at Sotheby’s in London in 2018, the painting – which was selling for millions of pounds  – was put through an automatic shredder as soon as the gavel hit the block and was later known as ‘Love is in the Bin’ and became almost instantly more valuable.

Banksy also went on a painting spree in the summer of 2024, creating a whopping nine new murals spanning across London, which could have contributed to Haslam believing that he has become somewhat ‘common’ and overhyped. 

While putting together his list of ‘common’ things for 2025, Haslam spared no one and nothing in the realm of art; targeting hanging photographs, the Sistine Chapel, oversized garden art and even the colour white. 

He has titled his £50 tea towel 'Art Things Nicky Haslam Finds Common' and the list contains 36 places and people who are lower class and concepts, words and phrases that he believes are used by 'commoners

He has titled his £50 tea towel ‘Art Things Nicky Haslam Finds Common’ and the list contains 36 places and people who are lower class and concepts, words and phrases that he believes are used by ‘commoners

Haslam said the exclusive one-off tea towel collaboration was to celebrate Saatchi Yates's 'incredible exhibition' called Once Upon a Time in London

Haslam said the exclusive one-off tea towel collaboration was to celebrate Saatchi Yates’s ‘incredible exhibition’ called Once Upon a Time in London

He also took aim at supermodel Kate Moss , who is on the list of averageness, despite modelling some of the world's most famous art in the form of fashion

He also took aim at supermodel Kate Moss , who is on the list of averageness, despite modelling some of the world’s most famous art in the form of fashion

The only designer brand on the list was French fashion house Saint Laurent which is currently being managed by Belgian-Italian creative, Anthony Vaccarello.

He has held this position since 2016 and the brand is owned by the French holding company Kering, which is also responsible for other renowned brands such as Gucci, Bottega Veneta, Balenciaga and Alexander McQueen.

Saint Laurent has been good enough for the likes of Nicole Kidman, Jane Fonda, Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga to wear at red carpet events, but it appears it is too ‘low class’ for Haslam.

Full list of ‘art things Nicky Haslam finds common’

  1. Selling art
  2. Artsplaining
  3. Sistine Chapel
  4. Christie’s
  5. Downlit art
  6. ‘Art is subjective’ 
  7. Silent auctions
  8. Children by Renoir
  9. Symbolism 
  10. Hanging photographs
  11. ‘Can’t see what you see in that’
  12. David Hockney can’t paint for toffee but can draw like a god
  13. Francis Bacon is the campest artist since Gustav Moreau 
  14. Waldemar Januszczak’s real name 
  15. Giverny 
  16. The Mona Lisa
  17. Oil paintings of big game
  18. Oversized garden art
  19. Studio visits
  20. Philistine 
  21. Genres 
  22. Frieze
  23. White
  24. Trauma
  25. Interpreted
  26. Banksy 
  27. Validation
  28. ‘Have you got anything to fit this space?’
  29. Meaningful 
  30. ‘I’m afraid it’s reserved’
  31. Kate Moss
  32. Tapestry wall hangings
  33. Have you noticed there is no ‘school’ of Lucien Freud 
  34. Saint Laurent
  35. Buying art at weekends
  36. The Biennale  

 

Tapestry wall hangings, Christie’s art gallery, the word trauma, and the phrase ‘art is subjective’ also made the notorious tea towel of 2025. 

Haslam said the exclusive one-off tea towel collaboration was to celebrate Saatchi Yates’s ‘incredible exhibition’ called Once Upon a Time in London

Last November, he released his 2024 tea towel just in time for Christmas and declared that his controversial list should be varied enough to upset everyone in some capacity as he took aim at dairy free alternatives, destination weddings and yellow bags (in which the products will be sold by Selfridges).

Although he appeared to take a veiled aim at Prince William through one of the ‘common’ things on his list, Haslam praised Meghan Markle for giving Prince Harry a ‘nice life’ as the pair mingle with A-listers in Montecito – away from what Haslam says are Harry’s ‘ghastly’ family.

He declared the Duchess too, was ‘ghastly’ but added she has ‘got guts’; referring to the Duke and Duchess’s move to California in 2020 when they stepped down as working royals.

Also on the list of 'common things' is Banksy, a pseudonymous England-based street artist and political activist who has created some of the most famous art in the world

Also on the list of ‘common things’ is Banksy, a pseudonymous England-based street artist and political activist who has created some of the most famous art in the world 

The only designer brand on the list was French fashion house Saint Laurent which is currently being managed by Belgian-Italian creative, Anthony Vaccarello (pictured with Kate Moss in 2022)

The only designer brand on the list was French fashion house Saint Laurent which is currently being managed by Belgian-Italian creative, Anthony Vaccarello (pictured with Kate Moss in 2022)

‘Who’d want to live in a damn cottage in Frogmore and open boring things and have to be part of that ghastly family, all of whom hate each other? Much more fun to be with movie stars and tycoons in California and flying about. Much nicer life, and she’s given it to Harry,’ he said.

Despite his apparently sharp barbs towards the royals, Haslam is friends with Queen Camilla and was once a decorator for King Charles. He was even associated with Wallis Simpson during the Swinging Sixties.

While putting together his list of ‘common’ things for 2024, Haslam spared no one and nothing; taking aim at people who get married abroad, people who have fire pits in their garden, people who drink almond milk and people who hold gender reveal parties.

He even put Vogue’s editor-in-chief Anna Wintour on the list for her daily routine, which she has shared on a number of occasions and involves her going to the gym and getting her hair done.

Among those considered lower class by Haslam are people who rescue dogs; suggesting an adopted pooch is now akin to a ‘Birkin bag’.

He revealed his method for devising the tea towel each year is by jotting down ‘common’ things throughout the year that have irritated him.

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