Glaring signs Harry is the ‘Spare’ in his marriage revealed by expert: How the words he whispered in Meghan’s ear during public event let slip his real role

Of all the things Prince Harry enjoyed during his trip to Colombia – the food, festivals and beautiful beaches – his drumming lesson likely wasn’t one of them.    

On the third day of the Sussexes’ quasi-royal tour of the country in August 2024, they visited a lively African drumming school in a suburb of the port city of Cartagena.

They learned the importance of preserving the culture of Cartagena, specifically its Afro-Colombian roots, and had their rhythm put to the test.

Harry and his wife, Meghan Markle, were seen on camera getting stuck in with the event, under strict security, playing the drums with the students and swaying along with the music 

And while all seemed well on the surface, Harry’s flushed face and body language showed he was struggling with the heat – as well as keeping up with the lesson.

At the time, expert lip reader Nicola Hickling told the Mirror that Harry said to Meghan: ‘Ooh, this is difficult, Meg.’

In the meantime, Meghan seemed in her element, smiling and keeping up with the pace. 

This is not the only time Harry has allowed his wife to take the starring role.

Speaking to MailOnline, royal expert Richard Fitzwilliams said that since moving to America five years ago, Harry hasn’t yet found his own way.

He said that Harry’s comfort zone is his charity work, and this is the direction in which he naturally finds himself leaning. 

Meanwhile, Meghan is most at ease in the spotlight and performing on stage. 

Harry grew up in the prim and proper Royal Family and crash-landed in Montecito with his Cali-cool wife.

The culture shock between the Royal Family and Meghan’s American influence could not be more apparent than when Bishop Michael Curry gave a passionate sermon at the Sussexes’ wedding.  

At the time MailOnline reported that Meghan had launched her own ‘mini-revolution’ as she married Harry in a multi-cultural and US-influenced wedding the likes of which Britain’s royals and the millions watching had never seen before. 

Guests even suggested it was the most diverse major event in the Queen’s then 66-year reign. 

However, more than a few eyebrows were raised when he went over his allotted six-minute time slot and preached for fourteen – and strayed from his prepared script.

His preaching was passionate and full of energy – which is not the kind of sermon the British Royal Family are used to hearing.

Lacey wrote: ‘Bewilderment, giggling, mouths agape, stifled laughter – the full range of upper-class British embarrassment was laid bare.’

Speaking of Harry’s ‘awkward’ body language during his drumming lesson, expert Judi James exclusively told MailOnline: ‘Harry is already looking a little like the Spare here, despite the way that this looks like a very traditional style of royal visit.

‘It’s Meghan appearing to take the lead and happily, confidently and excitedly immersing herself in the visit while Harry looks overcome by the heat or by his lack of talent on the drums.

‘He enters with a display of initial enthusiasm, holding Meghan’s hand and bouncing his body to signal appreciation and approval for the music the students are playing. 

‘He even seems to bite his lower lip to suggest he is thinking of getting into the music groove.

‘Meghan’s body language is far more regal, with a very poised sense of elegance and a classic Duchess smile that she seems to retain throughout this visit.

‘She sits equally poised on the dais as formal introductions are made but it’s here Harry begins to appear distracted, fidgeting rather than just sitting listening and reacting. 

‘Meghan’s clapping signals enthusiasm and encouragement, with her elbows lifted and her hands held high to perform a seal-clap. 

‘Harry claps while resting on one elbow though, suggesting a lower energy. 

‘His smiles are closed-lip, tempered smiles and he wipes the side of his nose with his thumb, suggesting the heat is getting to him.

‘Meghan even retains her poise and her apparent ability to stay cool as she sits at the drum. 

‘Her back is straight and her focused smile signals enthusiasm and a positive desire to do this right.

‘She drums with her fingertips with her fixed eye focus while a more glum-looking Harry appears to be struggling, looking across with his hands resting on the drum edge.

‘When the drumming is over, he leans back with his mouth open and rounded in an expression of relief and possible exhaustion. 

‘He looks across at Meghan as though looking to take his lead from her and she replies with a pit-bare gesture of confidence and power.

‘Harry’s face is red and shiny and he uses auto-contact gestures, touching his eye and wiping the sides of his nose and his mouth with his hand and sucking his lips in to suggests he’s either struggling with the heat and/or feeling a little out of his depth thanks to the drumming.’

Meghan has experience drumming with an old CV from her acting days suggesting that she has a range of musical talents, including playing the guitar, drums and ‘finger cymbals’.

Meghan is ambidextrous, meaning that she can use both her left and right hands comfortably. Only one per cent of people in the world are able to do this. 

This, perhaps, lead Harry to fall behind. 

Meghan also took the lead in conversation with her ability to speak Spanish while Harry relied on an earpiece, causing him to look lost. 

The drumming school director Rafael Ramos was ecstatic to see the Duchess was moved to her feet when watching a performance and said: ‘I love seeing Meghan’s big, big smile — I can tell she’s excited!’ 

At the time plenty of photos were released showing the Sussexes holding hands on the trip.

However despite their obvious joy, the body language expert said Harry appeared ‘wary’ and ‘in protective mode’ at times. 

During one particularly tender moment between the pair, Meghan pulled Harry’s hand close to her body while placing her free hand over his wrist. 

Judi said the act was a ‘tie-sign of bonding, ownership and affection’ from Meghan towards Harry. 

Throughout the trip, Harry fell into his role as Spare, allowing Meghan to take the lead in an environment where she was more naturally at ease.  

Perhaps Harry’s discomfort was also due to the fact that Senator Maria Fernanda Cabal previously branded the quasi-royal tour as ‘showmanship’ and ‘wasteful spending’.

The Sussexes’ tour to Colombia was on the invitation of the country’s vice-president, Francia Márquez and they received a heavy government-backed security operation throughout their trip.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s visit cost Colombia a total of £44,725.14, which included expenditure on security and internal transport throughout the trip.

More recently Harry and Meghan’s pivot back towards the royals became clear when the Duke and Duchess dramatically revamped the structure of their staff to make it more like the hierarchical system more closely associated with Buckingham Palace – and one which Harry is more accustomed to.

Last week, Mail on Sunday exclusively reported that King Charles and Prince Harry’s senior aides held a secret peace summit, marking the first significant move to resolving their rancorous family feud.   

Sources said last week’s meeting was the initial step in a ‘rapprochement process’ to restore the broken relationship between the Duke and Duchess of Sussex and the rest of the Royal Family. 

Attempts to heal rifts with both the Royal Family and the British public could not come at a better time for Harry with the 2027 Invictus Games set to take place in Birmingham. 

The Daily Telegraph reported last week that the Royal Family would be ‘very much welcome’ at the event and that Harry is expected to invite Charles and other family members to the games. 

With this in mind, the meeting could be the start of a period of reconciliation between both camps after five years of bitterness between the Palace and the Sussexes.

Perhaps it is time for Harry to leave his Spare title behind, both in his relationship and with his family.

Then again, this title gave him a sense of identity – and money-making – and may not be so simple to shake off.