T.S. Eliot was right, April is a cruel month. The daffodils are out, the clocks have gone forward and, theoretically, spring should feel like a fresh start. But for millions of people, the beginning of the month has brought something altogether less cheerful: the bills landing on their doormats.
Energy, council tax, water bills – and all of them up. These increases mean millions of households are now having to pay hundreds – even thousands – a year more.
Meanwhile, those of us at the coalface of mental health services are witnessing something the statistics can’t capture: the particular, grinding misery of not knowing how you are going to manage.
It’s important to talk about this. Not just the economics of it, but the psychological impact of financial stress and debt.
In my years as a psychiatrist, I have sat opposite countless patients whose ‘presenting problem’ was anxiety, depression or insomnia. However, it is only after scratching the surface that I often find money worries were at the root.
In my experience, it is one of those things people are reluctant to mention, as if admitting to being in financial difficulty is more shameful than almost anything else.
I’ve had patients disclose the most intimate details of their lives, such as childhood trauma, relationship breakdown and addiction, long before they will admit, with obvious humiliation, that they are in debt.
This shame is deeply damaging. The research consistently shows that poverty can harm mental health.
Studies reveal that people in debt are three times more likely to suffer from a mental health problem than those who aren’t
It is psychological torment: constant low-level anxiety, catastrophising at 3am.
Studies reveal that people in debt are three times more likely to suffer from a mental health problem than those who aren’t.
The link runs in both directions, of course: being psychologically unwell can make it harder to manage money, while debt makes mental illness worse. It is, for many people, a terrible spiral.
What does that look like in practice? First there is sleeplessness, which is almost universal. The brain, already primed for threat detection, goes into overdrive in the small hours when there is nothing to distract it.
Irritability follows, which puts a big strain on relationships.
I have seen marriages fracture not because of any fundamental incompatibility, but because financial pressure turned two reasonable people into short-tempered, exhausted strangers.
There’s also something I’d describe as a kind of paralysis.
You’d think that facing a financial problem would motivate many to act – spurred to call the bank or to look at outgoings and to seek advice. Yet often it has precisely the opposite effect.
The anxiety becomes so overwhelming that people avoid opening bank and credit card letters, they don’t check their accounts, or face the numbers at all.
Psychologically, this makes complete sense: we avoid things that frighten us. But of course, avoidance makes the problem worse, which increases anxiety, which increases the avoidance.
I have had patients whose debt problems had become unmanageable simply because they had, for years, been too frightened to open and confront important letters.
If this sounds like you, or someone you love, let me say something plainly: this is not ‘weakness’. It is a very human response to an acutely stressful situation.
The shame that surrounds financial difficulty is, frankly, one of its cruellest aspects.
So, what can actually help? First, I would urge anyone struggling to contact one of the free debt advice charities, such StepChange, Citizens Advice or National Debtline.
They are non-judgmental, the advisers have heard it all before and, crucially, they can help you see that the situation is rarely as hopeless as it feels at 3am.
One of the most powerful psychological interventions for debt is simply having a plan, which in itself can restore a sense of agency.
Second, talk to someone.
I have noticed the moment a patient says the words aloud: ‘I’m in debt and I don’t know what to do’, something shifts. The shame loses its power.
If your anxiety or low mood have reached the point where they are affecting your daily life, please speak to your GP.
Financial stress is an entirely legitimate reason to seek mental health support.
You don’t need to be in crisis. The time to ask for help is before you reach that point.
Don’t let online feuds smoulder
Victoria Beckham and Nicola Peltz have been at the centre of the Beckham feud that has seen Brooklyn cut off ties with his parents
Fans have been having fun this week speculating that Nicola Peltz Beckham, the wife of Brooklyn, was throwing shade at her estranged mother-in-law, Victoria, via Instagram.
In a post, Nicola, 31, shows off her flexibility by doing an impressive full splits, probably honed from playing a ballerina in her upcoming film Prima.
However, many couldn’t help notice how similar the photo was to Lady Beckham’s iconic leg poses and wondered if Nicola was trying deliberately to ‘one-up’ with her moves.
Ballet-crazy Victoria, of course, is famous for posting her hilarious leg-in-the-air pose, such as cocking her leg at a 90-degrees angle while doing everyday tasks, such as scrolling on her phone.
The implication being: your 90 degrees? I’ll raise you 180. It’s the kind of social media passive aggression that keeps feuds smouldering, rather than resolved, as they should be.
The Government has issued new guidance telling parents to keep screens away from toddlers at mealtimes. Good. But why stop at toddlers?
Mealtimes are an opportunity to talk. That conversation creates human connection and is fundamental to our mental wellbeing. I’ve worked in a family therapy unit where mobiles were banned at the evening meal. The children grumbled, then largely complied. It was invariably the parents who broke the rule.
So yes, keep toddlers off screens during meals, but adults need to hear the same message. The people in front of you are more important than those on screen.
Dr Max prescribes: Running for the bus
A study published this week in the European Heart Journal, following nearly 100,000 people over seven years, found that short bursts of vigorous activity reduce the risk of dementia by 63 per cent and type 2 diabetes by 60 per cent. Running for the bus, taking the stairs quickly: anything that makes you slightly breathless counts. The mental health benefits of exercise are equally well established. So, next time you see the bus pulling in ahead of you, don’t slow down to wait for the next one – dash for it.
