Men have called for the end of a controversial women-only app that allows users to name and shame the guys they’ve dated.
Founded by American entrepreneur Sean Cook in 2023, Tea exploded in popularity earlier this month – in part due to its divisive premise.
The app, which in July soared to the top of charts on the US App Store, allows users to ‘sip’ and ‘spill the tea’ on potential love interests – meaning women can dig up dirt on the men they’ve dated and potentially expose them as catfishes, cheats, and liars.
Despite Cook lauding it as a revolutionary forum that gives ‘women the tools they need to date safely in a world that often overlooks their protection’, outraged men are urging a complete ban on the ‘disgusting’ app for spreading ‘misinformation’ and ‘ruining lives’.
Tea currently has nearly two million users in the United States – with a waitlist that runs into hundreds of thousands of women clamouring for access to the background check app.
Considering it is billed as a safeguard for women against the dangers of modern-day dating, Tea has come under heightened scrutiny after back-to-back data breaches which exposed the photos and IDs of thousands of women in what one user has described as a ‘massive and preventable cyber attack’.
Fuelled by their rage against Tea, men have shared these leaked photos on anonymous imageboard website 4chan, where they are being mocked and ridiculed.
It has also led to the creation of a Facemash-style website [the precursor to Zuckerberg’s Facebook] where men are ranking verification selfies of women to decide the most – and least- attractive users.
Men have called for the end of a new women-only app that allows users to name and shame the guys they’ve dated (Pictured: British influencer Dylan Page discusses a growing gender rift seemingly caused by the Tea app)
On platforms like X and Reddit, men are asking for proof that the stories submitted to Tea are true, while one man queried how the world expected women to be ‘honest’ on such an app.
Of the many men claiming to be exposed on Tea, one said he was accused of ghosting and cheating on a woman, and has since ‘noticed a steep decline in my Hinge/dating app matches’ as a result.
A ‘Men’s Rights’ subreddit has gone as far as calling for Tea to be completely eliminated and is urging fellow men to ‘take five seconds out of their day to report’ the app.
As put by US influencer Noel Glenn Carter, ‘the Tea app is ruining men’s lives’.
‘The app is only for women so you have to prove that you’re a woman before you get accepted,’ the 26-year-old explained in a TikTok video.
‘The way the Tea app works is women will leave either green or red flags for men that they’ve dated – green being good, red being bad. They can also leave Yelp sort of reviews on these men as well’.
Tea claims it’s helped ‘over 1,700,000 women make safer dating decisions’ and to prove its dedication, has donated 10 per cent of its profits to the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
‘Dating should feel safe, informed, and empowering and Tea is here to make that a reality,’ it added.
Tea uses Reverse Image Search to catch a catfish, Phone Number Lookup to check for hidden marriages, and a number of background checks to uncover criminal records.
CEO Sean Cook – whose CV includes stints at top product development companies Salesforce and Shutterfly – likely included these features after witnessing his mom’s ‘terrifying experience’ with online dating.
‘Not only being catfished but unknowingly engaging with men who had criminal records,’ read a statement on the website.
’Realising that traditional dating apps do little to protect women, Sean knew something had to change. That’s why he built Tea – the first-ever dating safety platform for women’.
But this is the very cause that men are fighting against – and are loudly calling on others to join in the movement.
Some Reddit posts have called on men to report Tea app pages in both the Apple and Google Play app stores.
In one thread, an anonymous user raised his concerns about ‘doxxing’, and feared a ‘psycho’ he ‘ghosted’ in the past could turn up at his doorstep unannounced.
He wrote: ‘The slandering and doxxing is only the tip of the iceberg. One of the advertised features is finding a guy’s address just by inputting their phone number.
Tea allows users to sip and ‘spill the tea’; meaning women can dig up dirt on the men they’ve dated and potentially expose them as catfishes, cheats and liars (Pictured: UK content creator MIKEZ takes a swipe at Tea)
Men are asking for proof that the stories submitted to Tea are true, while some have accused it of ‘spreading misinformation’. Influencer Cyzz (pictured) appeared to praise the apps recent the data leak because women were ‘hating’ on men
‘Dating as a man was already unsafe with how often violent behaviour towards men goes legally unpunished (even worse when it comes to sexual crime), but now you go into any date (or just message in a dating app) knowing that the psycho you rejected/ghosted could be at your doorstep tomorrow…
‘…The fact that this is the #1 free app on the Apple store tells a lot about how normalised/encouraged this hostility and violence are.’
Another man pointed to the consequences of being featured in the app, after he was called out for being a ‘cheater’ and a ‘ghost’.
‘For the past few weeks I noticed a steep decline in my Hinge/dating app matches. I was wondering what was going on and saw something about the Tea app,’ he wrote.
‘[I] asked a friend to look and see if I’m on there, lo and behold I am. For reference, I cheated once, in high school with my first “girlfriend” who I went to prom with. This was eight years ago and I’ve never cheated on anyone since’.
The post became even more alarming after he stated his suspicions about who was behind the post – someone he believed had given him a sexually transmitted infection.
‘The “manipulation” arises from the same person,’ he continued. ‘And I am almost certain that the “ghosting” comes from a woman who gave me chlamydia, and when I found out she had lied about being tested, blocked her and never spoke again.
‘This is f***ed. I’m sorry I know this is a bit off topic but what the f***? I’m not even a manosphere guy but this is such an Men fume over controversial ‘name and shame’ app Tea that sees women accuse their dates of ‘red flag’ behaviour
Tea uses Reverse Image Search to catch a catfish, Phone Number Lookup to check for hidden marriages, and a number of background checks to uncover criminal records
Elsewhere, one man questioned how Tea could be legal if anyone could ‘make up literally whatever they want’.
‘What a horrific deterrent for men to be active in the dating scene’ he added.
‘I don’t see this app lasting for more than a month – seems like a class-action lawsuit waiting to happen,’ said another.
It’s certainly a possibility as this was the case for controversial Facebook group Are We Dating The Same Guy? last year.
The page was set up in New York in 2022 as a forum for women to warn each other of ‘men who might be liars, cheaters, abusers or exhibit any type of toxic or dangerous behaviour’.
It allows women to routinely post screenshots of men they have matched with on dating apps as they call on others to ‘dish the tea’.
Although its roots began in New York, the female-only group took off across multiple cities, including London, LA, Chicago and Brisbane. The London page skyrocketed from 20,000 members to 88,000 in less than a year.
At the time, British legal experts warned the Daily Mail that women in the UK must be ‘very cautious’ with what they write – and that false allegations could land them with a hefty legal bill.
A ‘Men’s Rights’ subreddit has gone as far as calling for Tea to be completely eliminated
Men have also taken to X to speak out against the Tea app
A 27-year-old man from London was alerted to posts on the group about him that said he was ‘too pushy’. He said a woman came back to his house and ‘acted weird’ before leaving.
He told Vice in 2023: ‘I knew I was in that group because I heard it from multiple sources and obviously her side doesn’t match my side.
‘We had a miscommunication and then I’m hearing from girls I grew up with that I’m a creep or that I did something. I don’t think these groups are helpful to anyone’.
Media law expert Jay Joshi of Taylor Hampton Solicitors told The Daily Mail if the allegation causes ‘serious harm to the reputation’ of the man, they could be exposed for claims of libel and misuse of private information.
‘It’s no different to whether it’s on this Facebook page or some other group,’ he explained. ‘The same thing applies to any statements published on social media platforms.
‘If you make statements that are untrue and it affects one’s reputation in a serious way, then they are going to be exposed.’
There are various defences individuals can rely on in the UK, including truth and honest opinion. The former is if the publisher can show a statement published is ‘substantially true’ and the latter is if they can prove that it is reasonably-held opinion based on facts available at the time the statement was published.
As Tea is a women-only app, it has fueled a gender war that has seen men lock horns with ladies over what they claim is an unfair violation of their privacy.
A female London creator called Tea ‘insane’ and advised women not to subscribe to the app because ‘we are so much better than this’
Tea recently suffered a major data breach which included 72,000 leaked images online
Some men have taken to TikTok to praise Tea’s data leak, with one man in particular saying women deserved to have their personal information ‘hacked’ for being ‘messy’.
One British man said the Tea users ‘hating on men’ were ‘chopped’ – GenZ speak for ugly.
‘I ain’t trying to violate but generally like 99 per cent of the women that were on this app hating on guys were chopped’.
He also presented the theory that the men targeted on Tea were disproportionate to the ‘horrible’-looking women exposing them, and so perhaps was the reason for their allegiance to the app.
A female London creator called the app ‘insane’ before telling women to ‘get it together’ because ‘we are so much better than this’.
She continued on TikTok: ‘We don’t need to be this messy – it’s never that deep.
‘It’s [the Tea app] kind of weird I can’t lie. Yes it may be funny for now but later there will always be repercussions,’ she concluded.
Repurcussions like the cyber security incident earlier this month that saw around 72,000 images leaked online – including 13,000 images of selfies or selfies featuring a photo identification that users submitted during account verification.
Another 59,000 images publicly viewable in the app from posts, comments and direct messages were also accessed without authorisation, according to a Tea spokesperson.
No email addresses or phone numbers were accessed, the company said, and the breach only affects users who signed up before February 2024.
‘Tea has engaged third-party cybersecurity experts and are working around the clock to secure its systems,’ the company said.
‘At this time, there is no evidence to suggest that additional user data was affected. Protecting tea users’ privacy and data is their highest priority.’
Less than two weeks later, Tea was forced to disable users’ Direct Messages after a second hack that saw 1.1 million private chats – about sensitive subjects like abortions and details like phone numbers – as recent as last week leaked online.
