WHEN 16-year-old Kibi Wade opened her Snapchat to a series of vile messages from school bullies she could take no more.
Plagued by dark thoughts, the teenager tragically took her own life after relentless messages that ordered who she could be friends with, who she should sit next to on the school bus and even when she could go to the toilet.
Her mum Michelle Barrett, 47, is now calling for a ban on social media for children – and has joined the fight for tech giants to hand over deceased children’s data.
She is campaigning alongside grieving mum Ellen Roome who believes her son Jools, 14, died after an online blackout challenge went wrong. A coroner gave a narrative verdict at his inquest and ruled out suicide.
Ellen, 49, last month became the first Brit to take TikTok to court in America in an effort to recover data from his phone.
Kibi’s mum Michelle said: “Our children are dying because of social media – something must be done about it. How long can we let this go on?
“This week would have been Kibi’s 18th birthday. It’s so hard seeing teenagers she knew celebrating their big day, including those that bullied her.”
Kibi’s stepmum Michelle Gardener, 50, says the teen faced horrendous bullying at school as her tormentors even blackmailed her into buying vapes and threatened to spread false rumours about her.
“She was very very distressed and hoped it would all come to an end when she left school in the summer but being on social media meant she was never really free.
“If she left one group chat the bullies found out and started abusing her again. There was just no escape.
“Eventually it all just became too much for her to cope with. The saddest thing is that she was a beautiful girl but grew to hate the way she looked because of the terrible things that were said to her.
“She hated people taking her picture so we have very few images of her. We know that she was also accessing information that encouraged her to self harm as we had dealt with it previously.”
The Sun has seen a series of sick Snapchat messages sent to Kibi’s phone seemingly from school mates who try to dictate every moment of her school day, including banning her from talking to certain classmates.
At one point Kibi, who took her own life in July 2024, is told she is “ugly” and “like a magnet the wrong way (as) everyone runs from you”.
Now Michelle, of Caistor, Lincs, wants answers about what else was on Kibi’s other social media accounts including TikTok and Instagram.
They hope Lincolnshire police, which is probing her death, will insist social media firms hand over Kibi’s data.
A police spokesman told The Sun: “We are still exploring various lines of enquiry in relation to Kibi’s tragic death, and until that investigation is concluded we are unable to comment further.”
You’re Not Alone
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide
It doesn’t discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It’s the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it’s rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
TikTok battle
Kibi’s parents have set up a petition to support a ban on social media use for under-16s after the Government in Australia placed severe restrictions on the likes of Facebook, TikTok, Facebook and Snapchat.
France could follow suit after lawmakers last week passed a bill that will stop under-15s from accessing online platforms.
Kibi’s mum Michelle and partner Michelle are throwing their weight behind the fight to force tech companies to hand over children’s data in cases of suspicious deaths.
They were among families who travelled to Parliament last week to demand change.
They were led by mum Ellen Roome MBE who faced down TikTok in an American court over her son Jools’ death in April 2022.
Jools had no history of self-harm or depression and was playing in a boat and toasting marshmallows with friends on the day he died.
Ellen, 49, from Gloucestershire, along with three other families, took TikTok to court in America. They are waiting to hear if they have been successful in their case to take it to the next legal level.
She wants the UK Government to bring in Jools’ Law which would stop tech firms from automatically getting rid of data.
Ellen said: “All I’ve ever wanted is to have everything looked at and to find out the truth.
“TikTok said to the four of us in the lawsuit that they might have deleted our children’s data. But if Jools’ Law comes in they won’t be able to destroy that data in the future.”
Kibi is not the only young Brit to take her own life after bullying on social media.
TikTok’s take
TikTok insists it has robust safety systems in place for children.
Asked to comment on Ellen’s Roome’s fight, a spokesman for the company said: “Our deepest sympathies remain with these families. We strictly prohibit content that promotes or encourages dangerous behaviour. Using robust detection systems and dedicated enforcement teams to proactively identify and remove this content, we remove 99% that’s found to break these rules before it is reported to us. As a company, we comply with the UK’s strict data protection laws.”
- The safety of people on our platform, particularly teens, is our priority.
- We proactively enforce our Community Guidelines using a mix of technology and human moderation.
- TikTok provides a safer experience for teens by design. With age-appropriate safety and privacy settings enabled by default, teens can discover, learn, and express themselves with age-appropriate settings enabled.
Honey Cook, 15, ended her life during lockdown in February 2021 after a vicious campaign of online bullying on Instagram – by girls she had never met.
Honey, of Barnsley, South Yorks, a talented artist, was sent more than 100 messages after being befriended by a group on Instagram, where she often posted her cosplay pictures.
Her mum Gemma Bentley, 39, previously told The Sun why she believes in a social media ban for children.
She said: “Kids say things to each other online they might not say in person and online grooming is a massive issue. It makes sense to ban them from platforms altogether.”
How to be bully aware
In a fast-moving world of social media, it can often be hard for parents to pick up on bullying.
According to the experts at Family Lives, there are some specific signs to look out for. These can be split into three different sections – emotional, physical and changes at school.
Emotional – the child is isolating themselves and not talking to family, they are becoming more withdrawn, there are changes in eating habits, and behaviour, such as becoming more angry, they avoid social media, they don’t see their friends outside school, they show new anxiety and nervousness.
Physical – the child may have unexplained bruises, cuts or
marks on their body, issues with sleep, complain of headaches or tummy aches and wet the bed.
Changes at school – the child suddenly starts doing badly in lesson, becomes anxious about school, claims to feel unwell more than usual, loses items or money that can’t be explained, have damaged possessions and refuse to take part in after school clubs.
You can call The National Bullying Helpline for a free consultation on 0300 323 0169. Ensure your offspring has the number for Childline on 0800 1111.
