HAPPY Mondays’ Shaun and Bez have urged men to be honest about their health as they get older.
The hard-living rave legends are famous for their drink and drug-fuelled lifestyle in the 1980s and ‘90s – but admit they take their wellbeing more seriously in middle age.
Singer Shaun Ryder, now 63, says he is now sober and using weight loss injections to relieve some of his health woes.
He has been open about struggles with hip pain and bladder and thyroid problems, and said a bout of pneumonia meant he missed the funeral of Stone Roses pal Mani, who died recently aged 63.
Speaking at an event hosted by Tena Men, Shaun said: “The truth is we’re not 25 anymore.
“Blokes are brilliant at taking the mick out of themselves instead of actually saying what’s going on.
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“If talking about it helps someone else realise they’re not on their own, that’s a good thing.
“There’s nothing rock ’n’ roll about suffering in silence.”
Polling by Tena Men found that 68 per cent of blokes say they do not talk openly about their health and 70 per cent joke about it.
Don’t wait – you don’t want to get old and fall apart
Bez,
NHS chiefs find them harder to reach than women and last year launched a specific men’s health strategy.
It will work at improving mental health support to reduce suicide rates, and encourage blokes to look after their hearts and get tested for prostate and testicular cancers.
The average male life expectancy in the UK is 79 compared to 83 for women.
Shaun and DJ Bez, who have been pals for more than 40 years, said they were lucky to have been so close in the band and “used to talk about everything”.
Bez, 61, added: “If me and Shaun can have a laugh about this stuff and still be honest, anyone can.
“Most lads just don’t want to feel daft or embarrassed, so they keep quiet.
“But once you start talking, you realise everyone’s got something going on.
“My advice would be don’t wait – you don’t want to get old and fall apart, you have to act now.”
FIVE WAYS TO HELP A MAN’S MENTAL HEALTH
THERAPIST Marisa Peer says men struggle to open up about their emotions and the crisis of “toxic masculinity” is age-old – but here she suggests some ways friends, family and partners can help a man who they fear might be struggling:
Use open-ended questions. Ask: “Is there anything on your mind?” Then stay present with the silence. There might be some resistance, but often the floodgates do open.
Practise active listening. Take an interest in the simple things someone is saying. Ask more questions, ask them to explain what they mean, and reflect on it.
Validate emotions. Just because you may not get stressed by something, that doesn’t mean someone else can’t or shouldn’t. Instead of saying: “Get on with it,” try: “This is how you feel now, am I right? Have you thought about anything you can do, or is there a way I can help you?”
Support without pressure. Let the person know you support them and that you are there for them – they will remember. Tell them: “When you’re ready, I’m ready.”
Challenge toxic narratives. If you hear someone say something derogatory, such as: “You need to man up,” ask: “Can you tell me what you mean when you say that?” It’s an attempt to make someone stating aggressive things think about the impact of their words.
