Meghan Markle refused the Queen’s advice to reconcile with her father but her ‘far-fetched’ excuse ‘avoided the truth’, according to royal author

In an effort to quash Thomas Markle‘s public attacks on the Royal Family, the Queen suggested Meghan Markle should visit her father in Mexico. 

But almost as quickly as the subject was broached, Meghan shut it down according to a royal author.  

Tom Bower wrote about the relationship between the estranged father and daughter in his 2022 book, Revenge: Meghan, Harry and the War Between the Windsors.

Thomas, 81, became embroiled in controversy before the royal wedding after it was revealed he staged paparazzi photos of himself preparing for the event.

The staged photos, which included him getting measured for a suit and looking at pictures of Meghan and Harry, were reportedly done to improve his public image.

While he initially claimed he would attend the wedding, he later stated he would not due to health concerns and the staged photos incident, which he deeply regretted.

Bower wrote: ‘Meghan’s father remained a problem. Ever since their previous conversations three days before the wedding, Thomas Markle’s attempts to re-establish contact with his daughter had failed.

‘Gradually, Thomas Markle believed he was the victim of Meghan’s blame-shifting and scapegoating.’

And then came his first appearance on ITV’s Good Morning Britain.

According to Bower, he was paid around £15,000 for the interview and said: ‘I’m a footnote in one of the great moments of history, rather than Dad walking her down the aisle.’

Writing in his tell-all memoir Spare, Harry lifted the curtain on the drama revolving around Thomas, which engulfed the Royal Family just days before the ceremony.

The Prince said that Meghan had spent months trying to ‘soothe’ her father, who had been left upset by his media coverage.

‘His pride was constantly wounded,’ Harry wrote. ‘Every day there was another humiliating photo in the paper.’

Considering Thomas’s previous unease with his coverage in the papers, Harry and Meghan were surprised when they got word that he had staged a candid photoshoot working with the paparazzi.

Asked point-blank if the story was true, Thomas said no.

Harry said: ‘He swore he’d never staged any photos, that he hadn’t taken part in any such charade, that he didn’t know the pap in question. Meg whispered to me: “I believe him”.’

But then the next morning, the story broke, and it was proved that Thomas had indeed lied.

‘A week before the wedding, this now became the story… Soon after the story broke, Thomas Markle sent us a text: “I’m so ashamed”,’ Harry wrote.

The story then took another dramatic turn when Thomas had a heart attack, which finally ended any prospect of him attending the wedding.

Despite his absence, Thomas still continued to cause ‘chaos’ for the bride and groom.

But Meghan and her father were not always adrift. 

While Meghan was a child, he worked gruelling hours on shows such as General Hospital and Married… with Children to send her to elite private schools.

When she started high school, Thomas got into a daily routine of dropping Meghan off at school and either collecting her himself or sending a limousine to bring her to his studio or her friend’s house while he finished work, according to Bower.

He wrote that Meghan was ‘utterly indulged’ by her father, with Thomas admitting he ‘spoiled her’.

Thomas said his efforts caused Meghan to change. ‘She became controlling at school, the master of ceremonies, and controlling at home too,’ he said.

Bower added: ‘He hoped the interview would be seen as a peace offering. 

‘”Friends” of Meghan told the media that Thomas Markle’s surprise appearance was “beyond disgraceful”.’

But instead of being silenced, as Meghan hoped her father would be by ignoring his calls, he continued to speak to the world’s media. 

‘He decided to give interviews until Meghan talked to him,’ Bower wrote.

‘Rather than resting his case, the spurned father lashed out at the Royal Family.’

Then, during Meghan’s one-week visit to the Castle of Mey beginning on July 28, Charles’s irritation about Thomas Markle’s TV appearances and criticisms of the Royal Family came to a head. 

‘Can’t she just go and see him and make this stop?’ Charles reportedly said.

Bower wrote: ‘Charles berated Harry. His son, according to Meghan, was endlessly explaining the situation about Thomas Markle’s behaviour to Charles and Camilla, but the “family seem to forget the context… they fundamentally don’t understand”.

‘The inconsistencies of Meghan’s excuses not only irritated Charles but also the Queen.

‘The monarch did not believe that Meghan could not resolve her differences with Thomas Markle. To persuade her to make an effort, she joined Charles in a conference call with Meghan and Harry.

‘At the outset, Charles and his mother urged Meghan to fly to America for a reconciliation. Meghan rejected the Queen’s suggestion.’

She apparently said: ‘It was completely unrealistic to think I could fly discreetly to Mexico, arrive unannounced at his doorstep as I had no means of secure communication with my father, to a location and residence I had never visited or known, in a small border town… and somehow hope to speak privately to my father without causing a frenzy of media attention and intrusion that could bring more embarrassment to the Royal Family.’

Bower wrote: ‘Her argument avoided the truth. Both Charles and the Queen realised that Meghan’s excuse was far-fetched. 

‘Puzzled by her attitude, neither Charles nor the Queen had heard Thomas Markle’s explanation for Meghan’s stubborn refusal to meet him.

‘The conference call ended with both the senior royals perplexed by Meghan’s conduct.

‘They fundamentally don’t understand,’ Meghan apparently complained during her visit to Castle Mey. 

‘They’ included Camilla, Bower wrote.

He added: ‘With nothing in common, Camilla was apprehensive about Harry’s future’

This is not the only time Meghan has raised eyebrows within the Firm for her apparent lack of respect for the Queen as matriarch. 

Journalist and royal biographer Sally Bedell Smith shared behind-the-scenes details of the Sussexes’ relationship with the Queen on her Substack Royal Extras, based on her conversations with Her Majesty’s late cousin Lady Elizabeth Anson.  

The late Queen Elizabeth allegedly ‘saw through’ Meghan Markle, and claimed her romance with Harry had become a ‘complete catastrophe’, just weeks before her death in September 2022. 

Lady Eliza, as she was known to friends, told Ms Bedell Smith that Harry had been ‘rude’ to his grandmother for 10 minutes during a meeting about his wedding and Meghan refused to disclose details of her dress, leaving the monarch ‘saddened‘.

Her comments echo claims made previously in the Spectator magazine that relations between Meghan, Harry and his grandmother were rather more complicated than the Sussexes have made out.

According to a source, the Queen made some strongly worded remarks about Meghan and Harry’s union to guests at Balmoral just a month before she died.

The source said: ‘It was out of character for the Queen…but she saw straight through Meghan.’

Meghan was apparently ‘full of charm’ and appeared ‘natural, intelligent, and thoughtful’ after she became engaged to Harry in 2017. 

But as the wedding approached, Meghan allegedly became increasingly ‘bossy’ and Liza said the Queen was privately ‘very worried’.

As for the Sussexes’ relationship with her father, Thomas has never met his son-in-law, Prince Harry, or his grandchildren, Archie and Lilibet.

His whole side of the family, for the most part, now has nothing to do with the Duchess. 

In July 2018, during an interview with The Mail on Sunday, Thomas claimed his daughter would be ‘nothing without me’. 

‘I made her the Duchess she is today.’

The Duchess’s father had been living in Mexico before he relocated to the Philippines earlier this year.

Thomas, along with his son, Thomas Jr, is now living on the tropical island of Cebu.

Speaking about his move to south-east Asia, Thomas told the Daily Mail: ‘I am ready for a change.

‘I have felt stuck in a rut for some time, and I am ready to meet new people and experience kindness.’

He said: ‘At 80 it is time to go somewhere where the people are lovely and I can enjoy a quieter, friendlier existence.

‘Mostly I just want peace. At 80, none of us know how long we have left. I want whatever time I have to be peaceful with none of the awful drama of recent years.’

But with the rift between father and daughter still as wide as ever, it seems unlikely Thomas will be making the 7,000-mile journey to reunite with Meghan any time soon.