A woman who watched her fiancé have sex with another woman on national television – and cheered him on – has revealed how swinging has restored his confidence after health issues left him grappling with low self-esteem.
Tom and Lauren from Devon have appeared on the latest series of the racy Channel 4 show – which sees couples try and experiment with their relationship; a viewing which saw the husband-to-be vomit after being told he had to let his partner sleep with another man.
But the pair have now shared how the steamy encounters with strangers have helped them overcome feelings of low self worth after life-threatening heart issues.
Speaking to Take A Break, Lauren, 32, revealed that while she’s known Tom since she was 17, they didn’t start dating until last year.
And while she ‘fancies the pants off’ her partner, Lauren – who is bisexual – admitted that ‘closing herself off to one gender left her feeling like something was missing’.
Nervously, she broached the subject of opening up their relationship – he ‘didn’t freak out’ and they ‘talked it through’.
‘The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him or make him feel like he wasn’t enough for me,’ Lauren explained.
‘In fact, I was suggesting this because I cared about our relationship so much and thought it would make us even stronger.’
Tom and Lauren from Devon have appeared on the latest series of the racy Channel 4 show – which sees couples try and experiment with their relationship; a viewing which saw the husband-to-be vomit after being told he had to let his partner sleep with another man
Satisfied, they agreed to ‘search for like minded lovers to have some fun with’, which included starting up a relationship with an older couple who they began swinging with.
Lauren said this brought her and Tom ‘even closer together’ – but things soon turned after a health scare left the pair terrified.
Tom began to feel ‘really unwell’ during a day out at the beach, and his pulse was ‘racing’. Lauren frantically got him to hospital, by which point he was ‘slipping in and out of consciousness’.
Doctors deduced that he was suffering from a bacterial infection – but further tests showed that Tom struggled with underlying issues which put him at risk of sudden cardiac arrest.
He was eventually diagnosed with bicuspid aortic valve – a defect which means the heart has ‘two cusps (flaps) instead of the usual three’.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, this can lead to serious complications – but is manageable with treatment.
The following year saw him grappling with ‘dangerous episodes which left him back in the hospital and needing more tests’.
Amid the chaos, during which Lauren said she felt ‘everything was unravelling’, she and Tom ‘vowed to cherish each day together’ as he may need open heart surgery in the future.
But the pair have now shared how the steamy encounters with strangers have helped them overcome feelings of low self worth after life-threatening heart issues
During the episode, Lauren described how an initial ‘sensual’ experience saw four women join the couple in a private room
Later in the episode non monogamy expert Effy Blue said that she wanted the dynamics to ‘change a bit’ and the pair should both have experiences without each other. Tom could then be heard being sick in the toilet – as Lauren ran to him with some water
The couple got engaged – but for Tom, feelings of newlywed bliss were marred by insecurities.
‘He’d always loved going to the gym but after being told not to exercise, he piled on weight and his confidence plummeted,’ Lauren revealed.
This meant he was ‘struggling in the bedroom’ – despite reassurances from his fiancée that she loves him ‘no matter what size’.
And while opening their relationship up had in past benefitted the couple, this time it was making him ‘more anxious’.
Lauren came across the programme Open House while scrolling on Facebook – and after a discussion they decided to apply.
‘There must be other men out there with similar issues to me,’ Tom told her. ‘I’d like to do it for them as well as us.’
Lauren said she assured him that ‘if it’s too much they can leave’ – as ‘his happiness comes first’.
But on the show, her heart ‘broke’ as Tom opened up about himself, expressing that he couldn’t bare to take his top off or look in the mirror due to self-hatred.
Effy told viewers: ‘Today is about challenging Tom to be independent. I’m curious to see how that will affect the dynamics they have between them’
Eventually the episode saw the pair successfully have sex with different people – and later all toast their success in the nude
During the episode, Lauren described how an initial ‘sensual’ experience saw four women join the couple in a private room.
‘I could tell he was anxious about not getting aroused, but he persevered,’ she said. ‘And then, suddenly, it was happening – one of the women was having sex with my fiancé! I burst into applause. I couldn’t stop myself… Finally, my Tom was back.’
Lauren then joined in too – and felt ‘exhilarated’.
Later in the episode non monogamy expert Effy Blue said that she wanted the dynamics to ‘change a bit’ and the pair should both have experiences without each other.
Effy told viewers: ‘Today is about challenging Tom to be independent. I’m curious to see how that will affect the dynamics they have between them.
‘Lauren needs to be a partner to Tom, not a caretaker.’
As they returned to their room, Lauren told Tom: ‘Don’t be nervous. You absolutely got this.’
She then told the camera: ‘It was my idea. It was my idea from the start. Yes it’s throwing me and Tom in the deep end…
‘But to be able to have him to have the confidence that we can go off, have our fun, come back to each other at the end of the night and it’s absolutely insane.’
The voiceover however continued: ‘But the thought of flying solo entirely naked isn’t sitting well with Tom.’
Tom could then be heard being sick in the toilet – as Lauren ran to him with some water.
‘This is going to be horrible,’ Tom confessed.
Lauren replied: ‘I just want to cuddle you.’
Tom said: ‘I feel absolutely petrified and sick.’
While hugging him from behind, Lauren tells him: ‘All that anyone can ask is that you just try, okay?’
Eventually the episode saw the pair successfully have sex with different people – and later all toast their success in the nude.
‘Seeing Tom, starkers, but totally relaxed, I couldn’t believe how far he’d come,’ Lauren concluded.
He has been on a health kick and has since lost three stone. The couple have also gone on to enjoy more couple swaps.
She quipped: ‘Tom and I always say were here for a good time not a long time.’
